Dating! What is the meaning of "dating"? These days dating is not what it used to be, today it's more "hanging out" is considered dating. In what I have seen lately, dating goes in this order: hangout, flirt, make out and then you "date" or "have a thing". It's more of a process of making out with different people, and less about getting to know them like you would if you actually dated. Back in the good old days dating started out like this: take them on a date, courtship, engagement, and then marriage. Now what does it mean to take them out on a date?
Let's talk about the 3 P's and how they can help you learn about what a date is. A date should be PLANNED, PAID, and PAIRED OFF. The 3 P's! Let's go through each one! Planned, now a date is normally planned out meaning you took time to think of a fun activity/activities to do during the date. And if you think of The Family: A proclamation to the World, a document helping us learn about how to have a family closer to God. It talks about how men/husbands need to learn how to preside for their family. I think learning how to plan a simple date, helps them learn to preside over their future family. Paid, when I say paid I don't mean you have to take your date to an expensive restaurant, or spend loads of money to do an activity. The best dates I have been on have been free! Something as simple as grabbing a $1 Coke as McDonalds and walking around the park or cooking dinner together. Doing something that can help you get to know the person. Making sure that you plan and "pay" for the date. Paired off, well this is something that is very rare to see these days. Especially if you have a group of people together hanging out. I think that asking someone on a date is terrifying, but it's also important to learn to communicate. Pairing off is important so that you can be responsible for that person for the day. It's a lot like protecting each other.
Now let me share the 3 T's! It's something that is called the "know" Quo, TOGETHERNESS, TALK and TIME. Togetherness is having shared experiences to help make that bond stronger. Talk, it helps you know that you are on the same page and share your thought and feeling with each other. Time is important, it mentions that you don't really know someone until more than 3 months of meeting them. I think the 3 p's and 3 t's and important to remember as you prepare yourself for dating and if you are already dating one person seriously. I think also in a marriage it can help you learn more about them as you go on dates EVEN WHEN YOU'RE MARRIED!
One thing that I want to learn to do and suggest to others is to go on more Assortative dates. Meaning that you go on dates with a wide variety of people, and sort out until you find one you want to marry. Too often in the LDS community, people go on one date with a person and decide they are wanting to get married. In my opinion that is too soon, you haven't even tried other personalities. I think it's hard to want to wait to get married until you feel like you found the one you "like like" as my generation would say. But, I discussed this topic with a few married men and women and each of them said that you would be able to know. I think my favorite answer was that of my Sister, she mentioned she has never felt the spirit around any guys she hung out with or went on date with until she went on dates with her now husband. It's not that they were doing anything spiritual or church related, the spirit just resided with them when they were together. I know it's hard to believe that would happen to any of us, but I believe that God has a plan, and He will let us know what that plan is.
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